Den Mother

20 05 2007


Who were you expecting to open the door?

Here I am wearing my favorite scarlet petticoat.

It made my backside stick out just as much as my belly.

I was a little over 8 months pregnant when this photo was taken. Believe or not, I was still able to work because my customers at Bobby’s Bar are real stand up guys who enjoy a good back-rub and a dirty joke almost as much as listening to Frank Sinatra!

The hair is a wig that I purchased last Summer from My Beauty on the corner of Austin and North Avenue. It was under $30. It is fun to wear the two toned layered wig with jeans and a short cashmere sweater now that my swollen belly is just about normal again.

Yeah for me, no stretch marks again. When I was a prego I rubbed my belly down with olive oil 2 times a day which is a old folk remedy for guarding against stretch marks.

Well let’s talk a minute about entertaining while pregnant.

I didn’t act (while I was pregnant) in any way unbecoming to motherhood while I was on the floor at work. That means I didn’t smoke or drink alcohol. Everything got toned down.


Once I started to really show I found more comfortable shoes to wear instead of my usual glittery platforms.

Every week I showed up with a new costume to show off my growing breasts. Some outfits were more flattering than others. I’ve only taken one costume class.

As much as I’ve tried, I can’t develop the patience for real sewing. Not to mention how worn out my hand muscles are from years of doing body work. However, when the need arises and there is nothing to suit my needs to be found at a store. I will grit my teeth and sew it myself!

In most cases it takes about 6 hours for me to make an outfit. My sewing machine has been broken forever and instead of fooling with it- I just sew by hand and use tacky glue as much as possible.

As of now, this is a one woman operation. There just isn’t enough time in the day to painfully complete each task and chore as I would if there wasn’t anything else to do but get ready for work!

#1. I had to conceive of how the fabric needed to fall to sweetly cover my ever growing belly.

#2. Choose the fabric. I go to a whole sale place called Textile Discount Outlet 2121 W. 21st Street Chicago, Illinois 60608, 773. 847.0572

That place has floors of showy fabrics at great prices, now that we have Skyscraper heels that will make custom shoes to match, you girls have all the information to make yourselves into ultimate divas.

Please send momma a picture or give me a call to let me know that you appreciate all my hard research work and writing

Give me a jingle at 900. 787. 6642. For 2.99 a minute you all can talk about 5 or 6 minutes and think of it as a tip for Momma. But you must be at least 18 to call!

I haven’t figured out how to link my paypal account to this blog or even if I can do it.

The information would get better if I could afford to hire some help! So please call Momma!



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