This post is for my nieces who in my opinion are too young to be having sex. It has been brought to my attention that somebody has been writing letters about sexual positions and the joys of sex to their boyfriends. I have not read the letters but this post is what I am practicing to say in regards to this matter.
How many mothers, Aunts or grandmothers have found such letters in your teens’ room or school back pack? What did you do? What did you say? Did you achieve the result that you had hoped for?
It may sound old fashion and surprising coming from someone in the sex industry but count me in as one who firmly believes that Sex is for mature grownups- meaning you are 21 years or older.
Hardly anyone waits until then- but it is never too late to reconsider and become chaste.
Sex, Sex Work and Domestic Violence are mature subjects but unfortunately people are not waiting until they are of the age of consent before doing it.
As if, some parents can’t wait until their children turn 18 so that the responsibility of the child’s actions doesn’t fall on them. Sorry to say- your child will always be a reflection of you and your ability to parent.
Parents need to confront their own dark side and presentation.
My stubbornness lays wait for me in my closet along with my lung illness- Sarcoidoisis. The condition is a menace to my good nature but has taught me to make the most of each day.
I would probably be a terrible mother if I didn’t think that I would be dead within 18 years. I know from personally experience that once a person can’t take care of themselves they need their children and friends to assist them. No one wants to take care of someone who has only been a source of sadness and trouble for them.
Here are my 12 reasons under age girls are having sex:
1. They have been physical abused at home
2. They are emotional abused in the home
3. They are sexual abused by someone they trust
4. Drug Abuse
5. otherwise low self esteem brought on by learning disabilities or physical handicaps
6. popularity challenges
7. lack of information- about the significance of body changes, puberty, hormones
8. lack of education in regards to getting turned on- for example coping skills for handling when a kiss gives you butterflies and wet pants
9. Adults in the life of the minor is embarrassed by sex and can’t talk about what is really challenging for the teen.
10. The teens’ religion says that sexual thoughts are wrong- period.
11. The girl is lonely. At age 11 or 12 kids are often left alone to become latch key kids. Parents figure they are too old for babysitters. Care takers are expensive. Some parents figure once their child become 11- it is a good time for them to return to school or work late.
If you hated hearing that- you will really hate this one…
12. Some girls are having sex for material gain- the word on the street is that boys who might have access to cash are offering gifts to girls their own age in exchange for or cooperation in sex.
I’m out here in the thick of it Mrs. Stiff Standards head in the Sand Housewife- girls talk to me in the club about their past because I ask. When I see the girls working it all wrong I question what they are used to because really want to help. It is tricky to apply what I learn in the club to my distant relatives. My nieces see me as a hippie artsy chick- not as Naughty Nurse Mika.
Parents need professional help in coping with sexually active teens and middle schoolers. If you suspect that your son or daughter is having sex- talk to your doctor so that the doctor can recommend services in your area. You should go for counseling before confronting the child.
A heated discussion can cause further damage to the already fragile relationship. My niece was threatened to be kicked out if she got pregnant. That’s nice.
What I would like to point out is that by starting to have sex as a young teen- you are putting yourself in a situation where you need to tolerate a boy’s appetite for sex and your normal emotional responses to acts of sex.
If you ask the young lady to describe the relationship before sex
Talk about her and his expectations of sex
And how the relationship and how they changed after sex…
This is a lot of thought…
My brother also pointed out how much more possessive young men are toward young ladies that they are having sex with…
How are the young girls able to prepare themselves for ‘belonging’ to another very young individual who can’t take care of himself… or perhaps the young boys aren’t that caught up in possession… perhaps the young girls are hoping to belong and will be disappointed with the lack of change from such an act of sex.
Ahh it becomes so complicated- it is simpler just NOT to do it. The best escape for anything is Education. After the rush of sex is over- you are still in the same place- education and more education is the only way to write your own ticket!
Readers? Your thoughts on talking to teens about sex.
Remember these may or not be our future sex workers- girls gone wild and wrong! According to the stats related to girls who fall into the sex industry…
oops where that paper go? ahhh it someplace in my pile of junk- I wrote down the numbers… hell.
hit my donate and support button to hear more- Come on folks- you’re telling me you are gonna miss $3 bucks????????????????